Grasshoppers thumped against the side panels; heavy, humid air clung like an old lady's purfume; I could taste the impending harvest; the air smelled green like eatting a fitful of grass.

Can't Rain All the Time

I hate waking up to mornings like this. Omnious, gray and brooding set the tone no matter what method I used to scour it from my skin and my soul. Today would be another one of those days – too many classes, too many meetings, too much rain.

The night dripped slowly with the rain of a late autumn monsoon. I watched the cigarette smoke curl toward the inky sky.

Sophie

Grief, that inner weeping child I call Sophie, has become an everyday part of me. Sophie sits in a corner waiting for a quiet moment to tug on my coat sleeve. Won’t you come play with me? Won’t you hold me?

I go many days without talking to Sophie. She gets upset, throws things and sneaks up on me, scares me into crying. Sophie has a way of doing this while I’m at a party, at the grocery store, or watching a movie with friends.

Peri rubbed her drowsy eyes and tried to wrap her sleep deprived mind around her next course of action.

"I gotta get rid of him," she said into her naptime pillow.

There had been too many nights with too many bad men. Chad wasn't a bad guy--he was fucking amazing--and every night they's shared was thrilling. However, Peri knew her feelings were the stronger of the two.

Rejection and disappointment were not a reality she was willing to face again. Not as she was just securing her sanity and her future. Not when her career was finally showing promise.

He'd failed the hug test. Why was she so reluctant to let this one go?

Friends was great but she'd already burned that bridge and there was no return.

Failed the hug test...