I'm not an addict

Yesterday I was accused of being an addict and asked if I'd ever been to a meeting.

This upsets me.

Furthermore, you can keep your 12 steps to yourself.

Bloody Hell

I have a sinus infection. The doctor's won't prescribe me any antibiotics because of all my allergies. Life sucks.

My ears are messed up so I'm dizzy so I get nauseous. The Vicks-Vapo rub isn't working anymore. I can't take most decongestants. Sucky!

Prayer

Please let submission fest go well. Please let the writing be amazing. Please make my decisions hard to make. I love tough decisions.

Oh... and one more thing ... I'd like to run into that guy from last night, you know the one I'm talking about.

Happy Rex Manning Day!

Pathfinder

Pathfinder Submission Fest is Wednesday, February 15 from 3-5 pm.

Submit up to 5 pieces of fiction, nonfiction, or poetry to Taylor 129 or send as a Word attachment to pathfinder@western.edu.

Manuscripts displaying the author's name will be not be read.

There are 4 scholarships of $100 for creative writing.

Please submit your best polished work.

readers

I've written a short fiction piece that needs readers. It is graphic and possibly disturbing. I'd love to put it in the Pathfinder, but I don't want to deal with protests.

Please let me know if you are interested in helping me out.

Unity!

I love that Dave got James Lipton to dance.

I love that James said "Piss on You."

Welcome back, Dave! We missed you! Hollywood may suck but your fans are devoted.

Thank you for reminding me that the hard times are about building character. I need that right now.

Observation

Have you ever noticed that Chinese left-overs in the fridge smell like pot?

Voices

Peri sat at her computer and stared at the blinking curser. Deadlines loomed and a story was jumping up and down at the back of her subconscious yelling "Pick me, pick me!"

She was afraid that giving the story a voice would destroy her; yet, she'd learned that suppressing a voice could kill her.

Instead of writing, she designed a new journal out of CD inserts. Album art. She used every piece of double-stick tape in her apartment and watched terrible television.

The voice would come in the middle of the night. Waking her at midnight and tearing across the pages of a small notebook usually tucked under a pillow.

Joey

Update

Hung out with Ryan last night for an hour or two. That was cool. He's cute and funny. But when a guy says he's only read two books in his life, I get a little nervous.

Went to Jon and Betsy's house to watch the opening ceremonies of the Olympics. That was cool except Jeff Krieg was being a douchebag as usual. What did I ever see in that guy?

Saw Jason from CB this week but I think he was more than a little f-ed up. That wasn't just pot and sex making him fall over. I know I'm good in bed but that was a little bizzare.

Classes are going well now that I don't have to deal with Justin's BS.

I think Brad might stop calling soon. At least I hope so.

Maps

I want to run or die or get fucked up. I wan to be blind and dumb and have no heart. I want to crawl in a hole and never come out. I want to wipe my existence straight off the map.

James Frey

Yo!

Bandaid

Peri was in need of a bandaid - one shaped in the form of a wasted man. It was on nights like this she thought that the hole in her heart the size of Jonas was going to swallow her.

rage

I hate being in therapy. I spend one hour a week trying to figure out my irrational thoughts and behaviour. I spend the rest of the week trying to figure out what the hell happened to me 20 years ago. I spend hours making correlations between my stomach and the fucked up behaviours of others.

How is someone supposed to feel when a professional explains that you are incapable of anger? Furthermore, I only experience rage. How do I respond that? I think back to the great lengths I go to in order to avoid anger/rage.

What the hell happened me? Do I really want to know?

I hate therapy!

I hate Professors

I really hate professors that can't mind their own fucking business.

Justin called me at home last night. I told him that I was not doing the film and I was dropping his class.

Justin then called Tory, asking Tory why I was dropping the class, why I was quitting the film. Tory told him to talk to me and mentioned that I had some personal issues I wanted to take care of.

Justin then asked Tory if I was a danger to myself or others.

Are you kidding me? I'm dropping his class so I must be suicidal. What a fucking idiot!

I knew that Justin was sexist but I didn't know he had a white knight complex. If I'm a danger to myself, I know where to get help and it sure as hell isn't from Justin.

I might be a danger to others now that I want to choke the shit of out him.

Shrink

"I'd like to make an appointment."

"Who would you like to see?"

"I want to see your meanest shrink. I don't respond well to therapists that want to hold my hand."

"Really? Why's that?"

"I'm manipulative and I hate therapy."

Valley Girl

Peri stared at the cute emo across the food court. Hair of a runway model, pink eyeshadow smudged into the coners of his eyes, nails painted day-glo orange, silver loop throuh his lower lip, plastic bracelets stacked in his waifish wrists.

Peri wanted to walk over tangle her fingers into the back of his black hair, pull his head back and let her tongue explore his depths.

She then imagined the yuppies shitting solid gold bricks at the sight of little Miss Strait-laced making out with a refugee from the streets of Los Angeles circa 1983.Valley Girls reinacted in the middle of WASP America.

AA

He possessed the honesty and politeness only a former addict can muster. Addiction recovery seemed to rid the mind of all inhibitions much like the abused substance freed the body. Tom had lost the inner censor. Years of AA had freed him to discuss the worst of the human condition - his.

Lilly

Aislin wasn't feeling self-destructive. She just didn't want to exist for awhile. Pull back inside and heal before facing the world again. Like a bulb waiting for spring to bloom.

Wish in one hand

I wish I could tell the truth
I wish I could cry
I wish I could sleep
I wish I could ...

DJ

I've been thinking about hiring this guy to DJ my graduation party. What do you think?