Vigor

"Nervous?" Darcy asked aloud, her voice echoed in the empty apartment. Her hands shook, her stomach tied into knots that would make any Kelt proud, her heart leapt under her mother-in-law's first communion cross.

Although she made professional decisions every day, she was making an active decision about her personal life and was terrified. She couldn't remember a time when she'd been so consumed with nerves - not jumping off a bridge in Idaho with a rubberband strapped to her midsection, not her wedding day. The closest thing she could compare it to was her birthday eleven years ago when she was sitting in a doctor's office awaiting a diagnosis that would change her life.

Tonight, she was taking charge. She'd made up her mind and was pursuing it with a vigor she usually reserved for intellectual pursuits. Books, theories, and ideas could not fail her or disappoint.

However, if she couldn't have what she wanted this night she wouldn't consider it again. It was a one time opportunity. She didn't have the energy to be this nervous beyond a few hours.

Darcy showered, smoked a Russian cigarette, downed some Alka-Seltzer and brushed her teeth. Now, there was only time to wait.